Giving is Receiving
I grew up with the reminder that “it is better to give than to receive”. My mother was a thoughtful woman who sat me down after every gift occasion to write my thank you notes. That tradition occurred somewhere between the Renaissance and 1955…yes I am old. She also taught me to give…there was nothing more exciting in my 6-year-old self than to take my small amount of savings and go to the Kresge company to shop for holiday gifts. I would manage to get everyone something and would find myself in high anticipation for them to open their present. Giving is still something I delight in – but in spite of the thank you note tradition; I never quite got the receiving part. I can hear my mom saying to a friend or family member…”oh you shouldn’t have…or this is too much” and I would watch their crestfallen faces at that response.
It took many years for me to realize why…as I too had a crestfallen expression when someone would say “but I didn’t get you anything”….or seemed embarrassed at my thoughtfulness. When I came into a new understanding that giving and receiving are the same -that when someone is delighted in my gift, I am receiving a gift…and when someone remembers me in any way at all, I am giving them the gift of appreciation. Of course, as I mentioned last week, the art of appreciation is to be public about it, to make it personal and practical for giver and receiver.
As we officially begin the season of giving with that oh so delightful label of “black Friday” there is even something grander to consider. To give without expecting anything in return…this one challenges me some days and fills my heart with joy on others- as I have made this a practice. I notice when I do with a full heart – that I am receiving something in that moment that is beautiful and complete. I have given for the joy of it – to celebrate the beloved in each and every one. There are infinite ways to do this – it doesn’t even have to be a material gift…a kind word can change the direction of a day –
As we consider our celebrations this season- I invite you to this practice…give, give, give and be aware that you are receiving in that very moment…receiving the gift that you are -Give it a try!
