Friendship-The Juice of Life
Friendship is both a deep topic and a wide topic. It couldn’t possibly be defined and described in one blog…probably needs an entire book. I am going to try and provide at least a teaser on this juice of life because I feel like it is something missing in our understanding and consequently, our lives. We give a lot of ink and airtime to the subject of romance and relationship as defined by love or partnering -far less ink and air are given to friendship – and yet that is the essence of real love.
AS children, we formed friendships based on proximity and common experience…most commonly school. We had our favorite interests from sports to dolls and whoever fit in our interest focus, is who we chose as our besties. As time went by it became more about thinking in the same way -beliefs, attitudes and values took center stage. Conversely those without those things did not make the cut. It continued into adulthood where politics and vocation became more the determinant along with work friends and wine after work friends.
The heart of friendship is far greater…it’s a recognition of the amazing diversity in the things mentioned above and the Love that drives them. That is harder to see – but in truth everything is an extension of love or a call for love. If you look closely you can see it – and more importantly you can feel it. You begin to see the other as an extension of yourself and appreciate the connection that ties the heart of the world together. At the persona level that person may be very different from you but at the heart level, eternally connected.
If I asked you right now to list your friends – I am guessing you would try to do it by category…your neighbor type friends…or your church type friends…or your work type friends. You might be tempted to describe the friendship as that external force that drew you together. I am suggesting that, like all of life, friendship is an inside out experience. You feel something internally that brings you together and in some cases creates a sense of friendship beyond the obvious. I feel like I am friends with some people I have never met – because I can get a glimpse of something beyond what shows up in the circumstance.
As people come and go in our lives, we can mistakenly think the friendship is over. There may have been an “incident” that provoked an apparent separation. I have had numerous experiences in that category and sometimes things come back around again and I find myself seeing something new and appreciating the person even more. My close friend for nearly 40 years keeps teaching me about the comings and the goings and the never endings.
Friendship is a true gift – an elixir of life if you will…and it can be as simple as your postal clerk ( I adore mine) or the maid of honor at your wedding (I adore mine) or your dog groomer ( I adore mine). I think you get the drift. Appreciate your friends this week…one and all…those present and those absent…see them as they truly are…ambassadors of love or invitations to love.
Enjoy this blast from the past and the phrase that will remind you of the “always” be your friend. Try saying to yourself and to others this week.
